Monday, September 16, 2013

Heartbroken

 I lost my sweet Lucy Saturday to cancer.  I can't say that I was surprised but still heartbroken.
She had not eaten but a few bites on Thursday and nothing before I left for work on Friday.  Friday evening she was slow to greet me following the rush of Sable and Joe.  She lay in the kitchen as I made dinner and still would not accept a treat of any kind.  My father and me fell asleep watching TV.  I get up to open the door to let everyone do their business before I close the pet door for the night.  I start to sit down on the patio when I realize Lucy had not followed.  She is still laying under the dining room table barely seen under my dust cover.  When she would not respond, I moved the table and she was just lying there breathing heavily.  I fell to my knees balling.  I know I must be an ugly crier.  You know the kind, like the actress Laura Dern in the movie Blue Velvet.  I don't know why I was so shocked to find her in that state considering she hadn't eaten.  I laid next to her while Joe and Sable paced the floor and my Father continue to sleep in his chair.  After I got my Father to bed, I managed to get Lucy on a sheet and I put her on the ottoman in the den.
I knew the vet's office opened at 7:00 AM on Saturdays so I spent the night petting her, crying, and apologizing to her. The office told me to bring her in at 8:00 AM.  I thought I was ready at this point but my legs were so weak and I thought that my knees would buckle when it came time to load her in my truck.  I had to place her on her bed in the back of my truck which I hated.  I had never allowed my girls or Joe to ride in the back of the truck but it was all I could manage at this point.  I made the trip in less than 15 minutes.  I went to the side door.  Holding my handkerchief to my face I told a vet tech that I had Lucy.  She looked startled and sympathetic and said okay and that she would get the vet.  Two techs came out and helped me carry her inside.  They left me in the room alone with her till I was ready for the vet.
I cried all the way home.  The only thing more heart wrenching than taking her away for the last time was coming home for the first time and her not here to greet me.
I loved Lucy.  She was not always affectionate when I needed her to be but she was so very protective of me and our home.  She was so good when I got Sable taking care of her and showing her the rules of the house.  I have often heard people question if their pets will be in heaven but I haven't really thought of that.  I feel like I had a little piece of heaven right here for over ten years with my Lucy girl.

Thank you for all your kind words, thoughts, and prayers, the last few weeks.


19 comments:

Tim said...

I'm so sorry Rick, Lucy was a beautiful girl and a wonderful companion. I've enjoyed her adventures on your blog. Hugs to you all. Tim and Lulu.

Buddy Bear said...

I'm sorry for your loss.

Blobby said...

I am so sorry to hear this. I know how much that Lucy is family - as all of our pets usually are.

I've said it before, I love my parents, but won't cry nearly as much as when I lose one of my furry friends.

Remember the good times, they help us make it through.

Jack said...

I'm so sorry about the loss of your beloved Lucy. My heart goes out to you. --Jack

ra husky said...

Love and prayers and soft husky wooooos,

RA

SEAN (The Jeep Guy) said...

I'm sorry sorry I know that you'll miss her as will Sable and Joe.

There was an episode of the original Twilight Zone where an old farmer and his dog die. The walk down and road and come to a gate with a handsome young man tells welcomes the old man to heaven but not the dog. The old man says then he doesn't want to go there and continues down the road. He meets another handsome man at a gate and tells them welcome to heaven. The old man says he won't go without his dog. The man says of course he's welcome and they both enter. Turns out the 1st man was the devil standing at the gates of hell.

All our pets will always be with us where ever we end up.

Howard in CT said...

Rick, this blog entry is the most beautiful, touching, and most profoundly moving entry you have ever posted in either blog since you began writing online.

I am so deeply sorry you have lost your Lucy, but I also feel like we, your followers, have lost "our Lucy" too.

We knew it was inevitable, but no one is ever ready for this.

Man, you did everything right for that sweet girl. You gave her the best life any creature could ever have. And you have more expressive photos of her than I can even imagine.

So let the tears fall, Man. You have the right to cry like a baby on this. And when they stop, let yourself relax, and feel comfort in knowing that Lucy is at that Rainbow Bridge, waiting, and thanking you for being the best Dad ever.

Peace. and Hugs.

Thor and Jack said...

We are so sorry to hear about Lucy. :-(

Thor, Jack and mom xx

Sam said...

Oh Rick, I'm so sorry. I'm crying too. Lucy was a favorite of mine. I wish I was closer to give you a hug.

Sam's Mom, Christine

Ur-spo said...

Having lost dogs you needn't explain your sorrow; all pet owners know what you are feeling.
I too want to lend a word of support and comfort. I am glad to see so many people here giving love.

Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

To lose a dog is so very very hard. They are entwined into our hearts...they are our best friends...they love us without condition. They are dirty, messy and have bad breath...they trash a freshly washed floor. And we love them dearly...please accept our condolenses for your Lucy.

XXOOOO

Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley

Harpers Keeper said...

I am so sorry for your loss. Through your blog I feel like I got a glimpse of her and know how much she was loved and will be missed.

Harpers Keeper said...

Thinking about you on "Wordless Wednesday". Best wishes

maN bOwerline said...

I'm sorry )=

Coco's Mommy said...

We are sorry to hear about sweet Lucy. We know she will be missed. Having been able to share such a bond with another, no matter the species, is special gift.

Alexis said...

Hey xxx I'm so sorry. I'm sure she was happy till the end. It's inevitable, and surely u treated her the best u could, so no need to be sad about it. Lots of peace & love. <3

Stan said...

Just noticed this on my blog roll. I'm so very sorry for your loss.
Hugs,
Stan

For Lucy:
"In life I loved you dearly,
In death I love you still.
In my heart you hold a place
no one could ever fill."

"Tommy" said...

I am sorry to hear of the passing of Lucy.

tom

Lori @ Projects Plenty said...

Rick, I am so very sorry about the loss of your special girl.

Lori